went on this quest with the intention to discover my life purpose, and I left knowing that I am here to unlock the histories and mysteries of erotic mysticism throughout time...
2 years ago, with a babe in my belly I embarked on a quest with a group of 16 women in the Arizona desert.
This was one of the MOST transformative experiences of my life, and I've had a few.
I spent 4 days alone, surrendering to and falling in love with the desert.
Her ocotillo's dancing in the wind, the hummingbirds mating in the gentle breeze, the saguaros whispering centuries of stories in my ear as I watched the orange sun kiss them to sleep each night.
These were the moments that kept me centered and grounded as I experienced the most physical discomfort ever during those 4 days.
Honestly, childbirth was basically a walk in the park after that. I would lie on the hard rocks in a small crevice of shade I found under a juniper shrub, in 100 degree heat and just sweat, talk to the baby growing in my belly, and write.
I had a dinner date with a gila monster, an encounter with a rattle snake, calls from the mountain lion arising me from my dreams, and so so so much more. I wrote SO much during that time, and I dreamt some of the most powerful dreams of my life. This entire experience was a melding of the sacred and the waking world. There was no separation.
I could write an entire book about those 4 days, but for today, I'll just share a poem that I wrote under and within the great womb of the starry, night sky on one of the most beautiful nights of my life.
My erotic muse
Arouses me from my dreams,
To remind me to open my eyes and gaze at the stars.
The sight is too beautiful to miss, I say looking into her eyes.
She knows that with just a glimpse
Of her most vulnerable openness,
I’ll find myself reaching for her.
My breath heavier with each inhale,
My hands wandering slowly and with intent,
I travel to new realms,
Further and further
Into the cosmic vortex of nothing and everything.
I plead for her to meet me on the moon,
Where gravity will not be missed,
And we’ll dance the most
Sacred of dances together,
In this palace of places,
This womb of wombs,
She demands
Pure devotion.
I take my time,
Whispering tenderly in her ear,
How she’s forever mine,
Drawing constellations across
Her body with my fingertips,
To remind her of our timeless journey,
Then I leave them in the night sky to prove
I never want another night without her.
From here I bring her earthside
And ask her to lay beside me,
Because I need nothing more
Then this moment together.
And with these words
Just for a moment,
She is all mine.
We moan together,
And linger along every curve
And kiss with such generosity
That time stops.
And with every orgasmic rush
In my body,
The earth shakes just a little,
And the great love that holds us both
Is satisfied at last.
She listens to us here.
So next time you have prayer for your erotic muse,
Take the time to flirt, fall in love,
And show her your devotion is all you live for.
It is here she will answer your call.